Olayinka S. Folorunso

To eat of human meat was abomination, to mate as wolf with wolf was abomination, and to seize the body of another man was the worst abomination of all.
— Varamyr Sixskins. Prologue, A Dance with Dragons

Abomination - Game of Thrones Season 6

Lyon, France - Saturday, Jul 02 2016

Abomination. That had always been Haggon’s favorite word. Abomination, abomination, abomination. To eat of human meat was abomination, to mate as wolf with wolf was abomination, and to seize the body of another man was the worst abomination of all. Haggon was weak, afraid of his own power. He died weeping and alone when I ripped his second life from him. Varamyr had devoured his heart himself. He taught me much and more, and the last thing I learned from him was the taste of human flesh.

Varamyr Sixskins. Prologue, A Dance with Dragons

This is the part where we talk about what an abomination Game of Thrones has become. It is completely unfair to compare the adaption of a work of fiction to its original. Nevertheless, it is unavoidable. Adapting fantasy book is a never ending presence in Hollywood. There has been and there will always be fantasy books adapted in the cinema and on TV. Specifically on fantasy, the only adaptations I have enjoyed are the Lord of the Ring trilogy and Game of Thrones Seasons 1 through 3. Let it be known that in cases, I didn’t read the books prior to watching the show or movies. For Harry Potter, I read all the books before seeing any of the movies. I hated them but I still enjoy watching them from time to time which is a lot easier than ready all 7 books. The only conclusion I can draw is that reading the book before sing its adaptation on screen is not a good idea, for me. And this is clearly evident considering that I read A Song of Ice and Fire after the third season of Game of Thrones and I have never looked at the show the same way since then.

I would like to pick my issues starting from the 4th season where Oberyn Martell lost his eye balls. Now that I think about it, that was a pretty damn good season. Peter Dinklage gave a wonderful performance at the trial of Tyrion of House Lannister. The purple was also a delight especially how the camera moved from scene to scene and watching King Joffrey die gave me more relief than a thousand lying whores. And there was the battle at Castle Black and King Stannis saving the day. That season was the best season of Game of Thrones in my humblest opinions and yet D&D screwed up.

What is D&D? Not Dungeons and Dragons but the two under-talented, overrated creators and writers of Game of Thrones, David Benioff and D. B. Weiss. These two’s rendition correlates exactly with what we call plot armor, which is exactly the only sane explanation behind GRRM keeping both Drama Queen Targaryean and Ugly Face Lannister alive. Do not take this to imply that I am not a fan of the Little Lion but do take this as a direct indication of my loath for the boring and insensitive Targaryen whore. Sticking to the context, D&D have had the first five books of the book series to produce the first five seasons of the show. They have done an incredible hiding behind the protection of the books and then when there is no source material to pull from, everything started sinking in the sixth season.

How deep did it stink. Sorry … sink. How well did it sink?

Let us start with the ridiculous catch phrase that was giving to Tyrion Lannister.

That’s what I do. I drink and I know things.

Tyrion Lannister. A Game of Thrones, A Dance with Dragons

A scenario having Tyrion putting words together to imply the above quotes would never have serious be that plain. Tyrion is one of the most eloquent and literal human ever graced westeros. Tyrion has more vocabulary and knowledge inside his too-big-to-sit-on-his-neck head. They might has well have replaces things with stuffs. “That’s what I do. I drink and I know stuffs,” mumbled Tyrion Lannister like the proud lion he is. And what things did he know to warrant such condescension in the presence of the all-beautiful Meisandre? He stated a simple fact, also in a lame way, that dragons do not do well in captivity. If you know any wild animal that enjoys captivity please drop a comment below.

It is simple to see that the show gradually became uneasy and impatient. It needed to be a complete story, and it needed to do it now. The show has made a lot of memory and the creators are panicking as we are, that GRRM may not finish the story. So with matters in their hands, they made a mess of it all. Abomination.

Tyrion Lannister was a brilliant character in the first four books of the series but the journey of Tyrion Lannister from Kingslanding to Meeren was the peak of his story.

Jon Snow. A very intelligent commander-to-be suddenly became an impulsive, blunt and moaping undead. His resurrection was cringeworthy. One of the critical point made in ADWD is the unspoken ethics of skinchanging written from the POV of Varamyr Sixskins in the prologue. It renders the life of a skinchanger who lived the life of a skinchanger in full awareness of his skinchanging ability. It was only a prologue but by the time you put down the book, it is not that difficult to understand the point of the prologue. Jon Snow is a skinchanger and that will be a critical part of his resurrection. I don’t the show really told us what a skinchanger is. It was not only for Jon’s. We say parallels of what we learned from Varamyr in Bran’s journey to Bloodraven who in one way or the other became the Three Eyed Raven in the show. Also due to the lack of creativit from the creators, the Three Eyed Raven also became a title that is now owned by Brandon Stark.

About Bran, one of the few countable things they did write was the portrayal of the time loop that created Hodor. I enjoyed it. But did they really have to kill Summer? How dumb do they think the viewers are. Eddard Stark was alive when Hodor was Wylis, also trained with him inside Winterfell. The show showed us that. What explanation do they have for Ned not ever calling him Wylis? Not once. It’s like the last five season didn’t even happen and there was nothing before the first episode of the first season. Further on, they honestly want us to buy the Tower of Joy flashback? A story that was almost never mentioned by any character prior to the flashback by Bran. How are we to understand the importance of that scene if every character had appeared to not have been affected by the events?

I’m running out of patience and I will scramble through the rest of my disappointments in no particular order.

The exploration of Ser Jorah to find Dany and how easy it was was weak. The unburt card, weak. Dany is not immune to fire. The teleportation of different characters from one city to another. The annoyingly dull and weak dialogues. The death of King Stannis, not from season six but it still hurts. Not knowing what to do with Reek. They’ll probably dispose him in yet another lazy manner. The kinslaying Martells. This one is a joke. Prince Doran Martell protected by Areo Hotah was stabbed to death together with Areo. Abomination. The inexplicable murder of the Blackfish. No Lady Stoneheart. No beautiful Knight quest for our bear (or maiden fair) Brienne of Tarth. Samwell Tarly somehow became annoying. A Targaryen with three Dragons at her command. Seven hells! Jaime Lannister still Cersei’s puppet. Cersei burning down the sept of Baelor. That I actually did like together with the King who could fly, or so he thought. The Crows-Eye who was supposed to be a complete bad ass only seemed like another Ramsey. No Victarion Greyjoy. Again, no Victarion Greyjoy. Apparently Jaqen H’ghar and the waif are the only faceless men and we must absolutely have missed how exactly Arya learned to change faces. No speech from Septon Meribald. No speech from Lord Too-Fat-to-Sit-a-Horse Manderly. Extinction of great houses like the Boltons and the Tyrells. The weak battle of the bastards misusing a Giant. A fooking Giant!

I’m tired and drowsy.

The show succeeded in doing what GRRM tried so hard to avoid. Creating black and white characters. George’s characters are shades of grey. A lot more than fifty of them Neither white nor black. But now we have the good guys and the bad gus and no one gives a shit about The Others beyond the wall. By no one, I meant the viewers not a girl. The show had two goals this seasons; set up a meeting with Cersei as Queen of the Iron Throne with Daenerys as the the Dragon Queen and the seasonal epic episode 9, the battle for Winterfell between one bastard and a falsely assigned bastard. I have come to accept the show to be what it is. It is a Game of Thrones not A Song of Ice and Fire . The show hasn’t moved on from the theme of the first book and it’s an abomination to the beautiful story being told by George R. R. Martin.